Can't Compete With Myself

Should of followed my true feeling. Should have done many things different.
I can't even compete with myself. Screw things up. Just should of said no.

Should is very common lately... :b :<
What annoys me more is I want to give up on hope.

I want to try.
I can't. :<
I wish I could rewind two weeks ago.
I wish I could be myself than this downer.
Am annoying.

Annoyed by self. I need to just continue not talking. That's my solution. Don't say a word.

Relax.
Would growing stronger really mean becoming more numb?
Sick..